Add SSL_CTX early callback

Provide a callback interface that gives the application the ability
to adjust the nascent SSL object at the earliest stage of ClientHello
processing, immediately after extensions have been collected but
before they have been processed.

This is akin to BoringSSL's "select_certificate_cb" (though it is not
API compatible), and as the name indicates, one major use is to examine
the supplied server name indication and select what certificate to
present to the client.  However, it can also be used to make more
sweeping configuration changes to the SSL object according to the
selected server identity and configuration.  That may include adjusting
the permitted TLS versions, swapping out the SSL_CTX object (as is
traditionally done in a tlsext_servername_callback), changing the
server's cipher list, and more.

We also wish to allow an early callback to indicate that it needs to perform
additional work asynchronously and resume processing later.  To that effect,
refactor the second hal...